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The Contemporary Catholic
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A place for today's Catholics
"Whenever you enter a house, extend your peace" Matt 10:12
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Catholic Weddings: Another Option
Contemporary Catholics are often searching for a non-judgmental,
sacramental experience different from that offered by the institutional
church. You may want to have a Catholic wedding but may not be
permitted, for various reasons, by the institutional church. We at The Contemporary Catholic offer you an alternative.
Those entering into second marriages, those experiencing
religious differences with the church and those turned-off by clericalism and scandals will find openness and
acceptance.
We provide marriage services in a
compassionate manner. Perhaps you have concerns about perceived
barriers. We treat you with the same care Christ gave to all who came
to him. Are these of concern to you?
Outdoor Weddings and Other Sites
The choice of location for your wedding is yours. Depending on weather
and other factors ceremonies may be held out-of-doors. While we
do not maintain any church buildings you may
also be able to use interdenominational
churches and chapels for more formal settings. Hotels, banquet halls,
private homes, museums and other locales are other options. A wedding
consultant or the yellow pages can yield additional suggestions.
Personalization of Wedding Ceremonies
We will be pleased to assist you in personalizing your wedding
ceremony. There are many ways in which this can be accomplished.
Options for readings, both from the scriptures and other sources, which
speak to marriage are permissible. Vows can be written by you or chosen
from more traditional options. Ceremonies which speak to various ethnic
groups such as the coin, rope and veil, hand fasting or
jumping-the-broom ceremonies can also be accommodated. We have a
Catholic/Orthodox ceremony that maintains the customs of both
traditions. Unity candles,
roses to parents, family blessings and other more traditional
activities can be easily included. Discussing your wishes with your
priest is the best way to
assure that your day is special.
Nuptial Mass and Wedding Ceremonies
Your
wedding ceremony will be very similar to that celebrated in the Roman
jurisdiction since we share the same liturgical forms. The Wedding Mass
is the preferred way of celebrating the sacrament. Because we are
ecumenical, all people participating in the ceremony are invited to the
altar for communion, regardless of religious affiliation. On a
practical side, it only adds a minimal amount of time to the length of
the ceremony. Wedding ceremonies can also be celebrated outside of the
Mass.
Previous Marriages
As Catholics, we believe in the sanctity of marriage; we also realize
that we are only too human. When a marriage ends through divorce, it is
often prima facie evidence that the essential element of marriage did
not exist to maintain the bond. While we do not have an annulment or
dispensation process, remarriage is allowed in order to avoid further
human tragedy. From this perspective we solemnizes remarriages
with the joy and the peace of Christ.
Religious Differences
As an ecumenical community, we are inclusive. We encourage
you to consider how religious differences might impact your
relationship. It is not one of those easily overlooked issues. We only
ask that you raise any children in a loving household and teach them to
love God and one another as He loves us, wholly and completely.
Marriage Preparation Classes
Your marriage represents a change in how you see yourself and your
relationship with others. It is both exciting and frightening. You can
control only part of what happens to you. Your family and friends are
here to support you and so is the community as a whole. Marriage
(Pre-Cana) preparation courses and individual counseling can help. We
encourage you to take time to prepare yourselves and will assist you as
time and distance allow. Your marriage will work only if both of you
are committed to making it work. Ideally, the priest would like to meet
with you at least once before the ceremony. You may also wish to participate in some formal preparation and we recommend Engaged Encounter, a weekend program run by couples for couples as an excellent opportunity to learn some basic skills to enhance your marriage.
Legal Issues
To be legally married, you will need to have a license from the county
clerk or the state department of registration for the place in which
the ceremony will occur. Often, there is a short waiting period, a
definite expiration date and sometimes other requirements. After the
ceremony, the priest will make sure that your license is signed and
sent to the appropriate agency. He will also provide a marriage
certificate for your more immediate use. You will need to have this or
a document issued by the county clerk to change driver’s licenses, bank
accounts, insurance plans and other legal documents after the wedding.
Recognition by the Roman Catholic church
Each jurisdiction has its own criteria for recognition of sacraments.
The Mission of St John the Beloved Apostle is not affiliated with the Roman
Catholic church. Through apostolic succession in the Old (Dutch)
Catholic tradition, we celebrate the same sacraments as those in the
Roman and Orthodox communities. Your marriage will be legal with the
state and a sacrament in the eyes of God.
Fees for Wedding Services
While we do not, on principle, have fees for religious services, we do
rely on donations to sustain and further the ministry. When couples
inquire about what to offer, we usually reference what officiants
typically receive around $400.
(Money is never an issue, however, and whatever is offered will be
gratefully accepted.) Because we do not have priests in every state, a
priest may be required to travel great distances to celebrate the
sacrament with you. In those instances we ask that those costs also be
covered separately from any donation. Please check with your
priest regarding this
matter as we do not deny the sacraments to anyone in financial distress. For our policy on donations and some guidelines, please click here.
What must I do to have a priest officiate at our wedding?
The first step is to complete and submit a Marriage Petition.
This will allow us to find a priest closest to you and begin a dialog
with you on your wedding. Ideally, we would like to personally meet at
least once with a couple. When this is not practical email and
telephone conversations may substitute. Your priest will work with you
to discuss marriage and help you plan your wedding.
Marriage Preparation Materials:
WRM
Marriage Packet: A series of materials to help you sort through the
various dynamics of your marriage. Couples should each read the
materials and dialog on them sharing their personal feelings as a
means of building trust int he relationship.
Part I: Why we marry?
Part II: Surrendering
Part III: Marriage Relationships
Part IV:
Marriage Counseling/Parental Blackmail:
Preparing for Marriage A short discussion of marriage used as a basis for some wedding homilies
On Money One of the major issues in marriage that should be addressed up front.
On Recovery Issues Brining baggage from a previous relationship into a new one can be a major problem.
On Kids: Divorced Parents and Remarriage Yours, mine and ours, a reality on marriage.
Link to :Engaged Encounter - Chicago- a weekend experience in learning how to communicate well with one another the rest of your married lives.
Sample Marriage Ceremonies, Rehearsal Information and Ceremony Outlines
Outline of Catholic Marriage Ceremony Outside of Mass
Sample Catholic Marriage Ceremony Outside of Mass
Sample Catholic Marriage Ceremony Inside of Mass
Outline of Catholic Marriage Ceremony Inside of Mass
Sample Catholic Marriage Ceremony Inside of Mass (Spanish/English)
Sample Catholic Marriage Ceremony Outside of Mass (Spanish/English)
Sample Catholic/Orthodox Marriage (Short Version) Ceremony Outside of Mass
Sample Orthodox-Catholic Marriage (Longer Version) Ceremony Outside of Mass
What you need on your wedding day
Rehearsal Outline Information
Preferred Wedding Vendor List
Preferred Wedding Vendor List Midwest and East
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